Another edition of “Wake Up Your Fucking Ideas Singapore”

May 8, 2005 at 11:25 pm 24 comments

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Suzanne: Welcome everyone to another edition of “Wake Up your Fucking Ideas Singapore”.
Richard: Yup, the no. 1 rated morning show in Singapore. For today’s discussion, we are going to talk about something that’s causing a great deal of controversies lately. We are referring of course to blogs.
Suzanne: Yes, as we all know, recently we have seen blogs grabbing the headlines for all the wrong reasons: Racist remarks, defamatory articles. The question is can’t bloggers themselves wise up a bit and put in a bit of common sense? To answer this question, we have invited Professor Mucus Tan from the School of Communication Studies at NTU and Mr Brown, a blogger who is considered a doyen in the Singapore blogging scene. Nice to have you here gentlemen.


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Mucus/Mr Brown: Nice to be here.
Suzanne: So tell me Professor Tan, are bloggers stupid or what?
Mucus: Well Suzanne, I can’t say for all. But frankly speaking, most blogs I read are pretty immature and lack a focus. So to a certain extent, yes most bloggers are stupid.
Mr Brown: I beg to differ. Personally I think
Suzanne: *looking slightly irritated* Hey Brownie, when I want your opinion, I will ask for it. For now, just be a dear, sit down and try to act interested in the discussion. Ok Professor Tan, now that we have establish a consensus that most bloggers are stupid, are there any sort of guidelines and regulations we need to implement?
Mucus: In my opinion, the government should form a new institution where all local blogs would come under its umbrella. In this way, proper monitoring and censorship would be safely ensured.
Richard suddenly leans forward to the group
Richard: Sorry to interrupt the discussion Suzanne. But we are getting a breaking news from one of our correspondent overseas now.
Suzanne: A breaking news. Wow. It has been a long time since we got one. How exciting.
Richard: Yes I know and I like to remind our viewers you are hearing it first on Channel News Asia.
Suzanne: Hurry up and tell Richard. The suspense is killing me.
Richard: *Looking very serious* We just received news that Pope John Paul II is dead.
Suzanne gasps
Suzanne: Get out of here.
Richard: It’s true. Pope John Paul II has just passed away. We are going to cross over “live” to our correspondent at the Vatican now. Hi correspondent, can you tell us what is the mood and atmosphere at the Vatican now.


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Correspondent: Well Richard, I’m very surprise to say that everything seems normal around here. There are no outpouring of grief from anyone. In fact, the only crowd congregating at St Peter Square now are the pigeons.
Richard: Any words from the Vatican?
Correspondent: I spoken to a few cardinals regarding this sudden demise of the pope, but all they did were giving me this weird look like I’m some kind of an idiot. The residents I interviewed in the vicinity kept laughing at me for no apparent reasons, some even called me a loser. I believe they must be so overwhelmed by emotions Richard.
Richard: I suppose they are trying to mask their feelings. Not everyone can control their emotions as well as we do.
Correspondent: I suppose so.
Richard: Thank you correspondent for your update. Back to the studio. Who have you on the line now Suzanne?
Suzanne: Well Richard, we have contacted Father Joseph from the United States as soon as the news breaks out. Hi Father Joseph, given what had happened, what do you think are the appropriate follow up procedures from the Vatican?


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Father Joseph: What procedures?
Suzanne: You know, the funeral, the selection of a successor and so on.
Father Joseph: What funeral? What successor?
Suzanne: *shaking her head and sighing in a condescending manner* Oh Richard, looks like someone is in a state of denial. Poor fellow.
Richard: For goodness sake Father. The man is dead. Face the fact and get a grip on your pathetic self.
Father Joseph: Are you guys talking about the late Pope John Paul II?
Suzanne: Wake up and smell the roses Father Joseph. Of course we are talking about him. Who else could we be talking?
Father Joseph: For your information, Pope John Paul II passed away weeks ago YOU STUPID MORON. The new pope is Pope Benedict XVI.
Long awkward silence in the studio

Suzanne: *Laughing nervously* Hahaha. Of course we knew that, didn’t we Richard?
Richard: Hahaha, of course of course. This is actually a prank we play once in a while. Gotcha. Hahaha.
Long silence again.

Suzanne: Lets go for a commercial break.
Richard: Good idea Suzanne.

Commercial Break

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Interview with Taufik and Sylvester 111709006634821839

24 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Claris  |  May 8, 2005 at 1:37 am

    Can’t wait for the commercial break to end!

    Reply
  • 2. Ed, Edd & Eddy !!!  |  May 8, 2005 at 1:46 am

    Hahaha. Local satire at its best!

    Reply
  • 3. Daniel  |  May 8, 2005 at 2:28 am

    haha everyone in here has funny hair.

    Reply
  • 4. Oikono  |  May 8, 2005 at 4:40 am

    good play on the whole Channel News Asia ‘breaking news’ thingie…Hope they don’t sue you!

    Reply
  • 5. aGent X  |  May 8, 2005 at 6:53 am

    it’s hilarious! great script and perhaps u may consider pod-casting it :) well done!

    Reply
  • 6. A.Ball.of.Yarn  |  May 8, 2005 at 10:55 am

    nicely done, cheeky. :) bring these characters back for a new episode soon.

    Reply
  • 7. cowboy caleb  |  May 9, 2005 at 12:21 am

    dude, you are the best!

    More more more!!!

    Reply
  • 8. annz  |  May 9, 2005 at 2:19 am

    i’m sure you get this a lot, but it has to be said! you’re freeeeaking hilarious!

    Reply
  • 9. squawkster  |  May 9, 2005 at 12:19 pm

    Update, update……. need more doses of Cheeky.

    Reply
  • 10. Counter-Revolutionary  |  May 9, 2005 at 7:54 pm

    man i love ya style cheeky! gd job and keep it up! i’ll always be supporting ya!

    Reply
  • 11. pea  |  May 9, 2005 at 10:54 pm

    it’s school of communication and information! haha. so cheeky la you satirize CNA.

    so when will you marry me?

    Reply
  • 12. zardson  |  May 10, 2005 at 7:38 am

    ehh why the focus of the story changed from blogging to the pope?? i wanna noe wad else mr brown says about blogging!!

    Reply
  • 13. suspiciousbastard  |  May 10, 2005 at 11:10 am

    Ah. Political satire at its best.

    Reply
  • 14. Skye Bleu  |  May 11, 2005 at 12:06 am

    haha.. i need to know what Brownie has to say!! haha

    nice one there on the Channel News Later incident.. that’s witty cheeky.. at your best as usual.. haha.. :)

    Reply
  • 15. cheeky  |  May 11, 2005 at 12:40 am

    oikono: i not scare.
    agent X: I’m a tech idiot.
    ball of yarn: will do
    pea: is it? we used to called it communication studies. actually want to get in wan, but my ang moh cannot make it. I’m attached but i don’t mind a threesome.
    wizardson/skye: brownie said nothing further. Too pissed.
    annz: Thanks.
    daniel: Now u remind me
    rest: Thanks

    Reply
  • 16. Kai  |  May 13, 2005 at 1:31 am

    i like ur blog man. channelnewsasia the best. rock on cheeky

    Reply
  • 17. Zen|th  |  May 13, 2005 at 4:08 pm

    LoL~ What happened to Mr Brown and Mr Mucus?

    Reply
  • 18. JanK  |  May 14, 2005 at 7:35 pm

    haha… that’s a good one! But yeah, what happened to mr brown and professor mucus?

    xoxo Jank

    Reply
  • 19. G  |  May 18, 2005 at 12:58 am

    AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ROFLMAO WTF LOL!

    oh man you’re the best!

    that really subtle “breaking news” part was just excellent work.

    more! more!

    Reply
  • 20. Anonymous  |  May 20, 2005 at 7:43 pm

    You should write a story on china women in Singapore. Damn those whores…

    Reply
  • 21. Anonymous  |  May 24, 2005 at 10:29 am

    damn funny dude…
    btw the singapore idol interview really kick ass man…haha…

    Reply
  • 22. cheeky  |  May 25, 2005 at 11:51 pm

    zen|th/jank: Mucus and Brownie has left the studio. Haha.

    g/expro/anons: Thanks.

    Reply
  • 23. «JøhñN¥z™»  |  June 2, 2005 at 6:09 pm

    zhe wei, is this ur product? or ur fren’s? anyway, its funny

    Reply
  • 24. Anonymous  |  October 4, 2005 at 7:31 pm

    cast music pod
    Information cast music pod

    Reply

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