Introducing Cheeky Times Resident Counsellor: Dr Wee Shu Shu

Dear Dr Wee,

I’m feeling damn tulang lately because I have been laid off from my work even though limpeh has been working in the cheebye factory for over 10 years. No thanks to cheap cheebye like

and

I like to ask you, as a pink IC holder to another pink IC holder, where can I go and seek help. I alreadi 45 years old, sec 2 education only with a family of six to feed. Also I damn tulang of our gahmen. Where can I complain to?
Thank you

Wee Lian Fatt

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Dear Wee,

First of all, why do all the losers have my surname? WHY? WHY HAH? You people are what I dismiss as crackpots, your gestures, behaviours and tones are all so typical of heartlanders. READ “LOW CLASS”! Fuck man, you can’t even string a proper sentence together. Do you know I have a hard time deciphering your letter. Wee ah Wee, how can you expect to have an iron rice bowl when you can’t even spell. Life will kick you in the balls I tell you (if you do have one . . . though I doubt so hur hur).

No point lambasting our great government Wee. This world is about winners and losers and this is the stark reality you have to face. You my friend, are what I assume to be one of those wretched and undermotivated leeches sucking our valuable resources dry and who does nothing but lament day in day out about foreign talents. So why don’t you do me a big favour and fuck off from my elite uncaring face you piece of low class uneducated shit.

Yours Sincerely

Dr Wee Shu Shu
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Dear Dr Wee

Hello, what’s your problem hah? People nice nice write to you, you nice nice reply lah. Why must insult? Why?

Wee Lian Fatt

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Dear Wee

Yours Sincerely

Dr Wee Shu Shu
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NINABEH CHAO CHEEBYE! WHAT’S YOUR FUCKING PROBLEM HAH BITCH? I TOK TO YOU NICE NICE WHY YOU MUST LIKE DAT? WHY?

Wee Lian Fatt

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Dear Wee

Yours Sincerely

Dr Wee Shu Shu
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DIE BITCH DIEEEEEE!!!!!

From Lim peh Gonna Get You!

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About our Counsellor

Dr Wee Shu Shu is a well known counsellor in Singapore who has been dilligently honing her craft and antagonising thousands of people throughout her career for over 20 years. Despite numerous assassination attempts from her ex-readers, Dr Wee remains a strong advocate of the controversial counselling technique called “Confrontational Counselling” as she believes that rages generated from the session can be re-channelled to help the person overcome any adversities in life. She is also the author of the best selling book “Grow a dick you pathetic loser!”

Singapore Hip Hop Awards

Yo yo yo, in conjunction with the Gahmen plan to create a more vibrant and diverse landscape in Singapore, the very first Singapore Hip Hop Awards was held recently at the Singapore Indoor Stadium attracting the who’s who of the local hip hop community. It was a night of exhilarating performances and emotional highs for everyone involved and Cheeky Times was fortunate to be there to capture every bit of it. Today we profile some of the winners and up and coming hip hop artistes practising their crafts in
Singapore.