Cleo’s 50 Most Eligible Bachelors (The Kana Sai Edition)

Name: Agugu Mutomobi
Age: 25
Nationality: Nigerian
Occupation: Fucked up S-League football player

How long have you been in Singapore?
3 fucking years

What made you decides to come to Singapore?
Civil war and famine at home.

Which part of your body are you most proud of?
My cock.

Whoa ho. Steady lah brudder. Why?
Because it’s damn long! Duh.

Which part of your body do you most want to change then?
My cock.

Again? Why?
I want it to be longer! Duh.

Very greedy. What about your favourite colour?
White. It has been my dream since childhood.

Criterias you look for in a woman.
Must be white. As white as Nicole Kidman.

Favourite Singaporean food?
All the food here sucks!

Favourite phrase?
Agugu ain’t taking no shit from anyone! Ya hear me!?

Boxers or briefs?
Briefs. XXXL.

Sibeh show-off. Describe yourself in 3 words.
Mine’s the longest!

Bush, Hu and a fucked up Interpreter

George Bush, President of the United States of America

Hu Jing Tao, President of the People’s Republic of China

Damn fucked up Singaporean Interpreter